Keeping Up

Is it possible to keep up with technology?

Unless it's your full time job, that is.  If you even have a full time job anymore, in this ever-growing freelance kind of world, where the only people who get any help seem to be the billionaires and the giant corporations who appear to be destroying the world with their greed.

Check your email, check Facebook, post on Facebook, check Twitter, post on Instagram, on Snapchat, show everyone what you had for lunch, and oh yes, did you start a blog intending to write on it every day? Every week? Every month?

Tapping on your phone while you're walking down the street. Avoiding personal interaction? Avoiding having a face to face conversation with a person? Or it's just easier.  But is it?

Is it possible to keep up?

21st Century Overload.

This is the oldest I've been yet

Every year our birthday gives us a time to reflect.  Sometimes we're happy with where we find ourselves, other times we wish we would have accomplished more by this age… whatever age that is.  It's part of life.

Often we complain about aging, getting older. But once you've known someone who never got the chance to get old, that changes.  For me, when my brother, Michael and my friend, Jana each died before they had a chance to get old, I realized that I could not complain about getting older, in honor of them. They never got to be this old.

Sometimes life is fun, sometimes it's difficult.  Some days are hard, some are easy. But onward we go, because, well, this is all we've got! We strive to keep a balance in life, aim to stay positive, and enjoy the time we have with the people we love. We continue to get older, because that's what we all do.

So, this is the oldest I've been yet, but I hope to get much older before I'm through.
Here's to a great year ahead!

So Much Time, So Little To Do

Wait... Strike that, reverse it.


This, I believe is a quote from Willy Wonka. It is how I feel about the world lately.  
Too much to do!  Computers were supposed to make our lives easier (weren't they?) but they  just give us more stuff to keep track of.  Access to more information, certainly, but how do we keep track of it all?

We can search the Web for answers to anything.  It is amazing, any question you can think of, someone else in the world has the answer, or has at least asked the same question.  The learning possibilities are endless.  It's exciting. And time-consuming. Especially when one page has an interesting link to another, and then to another, and then you see something else interesting, and that reminds you of another thing you want to look up and then... wait, what was I searching for?

Check emails, read, reply to some, save others till later, until the email box is overflowing, go back through the old ones, and try to remember, why was I saving this? Delete. Delete.  Check your Facebook page, update. Check Linked In, update.  And Twitter. And Pinterest. And all the others I don't use. Watch a video clip. Listen to some music.  Remember to write something on your blog, at least once in awhile.  Send out some pictures. Pay your bills. Check emails again. And Facebook. And Linked In.... it's truly neverending.

How do you keep up with it all?

Maybe it's just me. Some days it's hard to focus.  I have to work on that.  
But first, let me go read that thing I just found...

Would you rather type than talk?

While I appreciate the value of emails and texting in many situations, I'm curious how many people are typing, primarily to avoid talking to people.

Originally it seemed that texting was a way to use the phone when you shouldn't be on your phone at all ... in class or in a meeting. Then someone told me that they didn't actually want to talk to their friend and get into a long phone call, they just wanted to send a message to them. It's more of a one-way communication to me ... until your friend texts you back, I guess.

So, would you rather text a friend than actually speak to them? There are situations where typing is better than talking, but are those situations becoming more frequent for many people? Is there an age gap in how we think about texting? It seems that kids, teens and 20-somethings may spend more time texting than talking. But I start to wonder, are they still learning how to have conversations or are they avoiding that by texting?

Is there any danger that people will lose their verbal skills? It is still important to develop the ability to quickly verbalize your thoughts on the phone, or make eye contact in face-to-face conversation, isn't it? It's something that you can really only learn by doing. We've all been in awkward social situations... feeling shy, standing alone at a party or at a business function, trying to find a friendly person to talk to. By going through this, we begin to learn how to connect, verbally, face to face. Small talk may seem unimportant, but it can lead to great connections and conversations. It is different than typing into a computer or phone keypad.

Both written and verbal communication have value. I just hope we're not losing the ability for face-to-face verbal conversations.

With new technology, it takes awhile for us to figure out the best balance, the proper usage, and how it fits with other technology. In the New York Times article that got me thinking about this talk vs. text subject, the writer says it was the same when telephones first appeared. What was considered the proper usage for the telephone has changed quite a bit through the years.

The article, "Don't Call Me, I Won't Call You" is an interesting and amusing take on it. Here's the link:

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/03/20/fashion/20Cultural.html?ei=5087&en=c81b98c29f1a5ea0&ex=1316491200&pagewanted=all

What do you think? Do we still know how to converse with each other? Would you rather type than talk?

A New Year. Friends. Experiences. Balance.

2011 Where did that first decade of the 2000's go anyway?

Though I know it's a cliche, time does seem to travel faster as we get older. But it is always a good time for reflection. How did we do last year? What would we like the next year to look like? What choices will we make? What is important? How do we find the balance that works for us?

Most people have limited amounts of money and free time. And we never seem to have both at once... When you have money (you're working) you don't have much free time (that work thing takes up way too much of our precious time!). And when you have free time (as in unemployed) you usually don't have money.

So when you have a little extra time and money, what do you do? Would you rather acquire more things, more stuff? Or do you spend it on experiences, like travel? Finding a good balance is the key. And living in small apartments has taught me a lesson about owning too much stuff... "but where would I put it?"

So last year, I took some money out of savings, and opted for an experience, a travel adventure. Using the JetBlue All You Can Jet Pass, I travelled for 30 straight days, spending money on transportation, food and lodging. More importantly, that pass enabled me to visit many friends and family who are scattered all over the country.

Maybe the secret to making choices in the new year is to keep in mind the relationships that are important to us and try not to lose track of them. It's hard to do because everyone's lives are so busy. But enjoying time with our real family and our "chosen family" (our friends) is valuable. And I always like to shake up the routine, see new places, explore new horizons.

So now the obvious question for me in the new year is .... where can I go and who can I visit in 2011?

Beach Therapy

Is it the feel of the ocean breeze, and the sea air? Is it the light on the water, even on a cloudy day? Is it the sounds of the waves and their rhythm? Is it the calls of the seagulls, the diving pelicans, the occasional visit by dolphins?

For me, it's the combination of all these sensations that makes a solo visit to a quiet beach so refreshing. It's my beach therapy. Sit and watch the shifting sunlight in the changing clouds, the rippling water. Calm my breathing, quietly getting in sync with the waves' rhythms. Breathe in the ocean breezes, listen to the seagulls, feel the sand on my feet, between my toes. Something for all the senses, a calming meditation. Even if it's just for a few minutes, you can leave the troubles of the world behind, enjoy being in the present moment, soaking in the beauties of nature, to breathe deeply, relax and recharge, before returning to life's routines.

I'm lucky, I live near enough to an ocean to enjoy occasional beach therapy sessions. When I haven't been near the ocean, I found that looking out on a lake or a river works, too. Even without the large ocean waves, watching the ripples in the water can have a relaxing, calming influence. For some people, being up in a mountain or standing amongst the trees in a forest is their favorite place for quiet contemplation, or a calming meditation. For me, it's sitting in the sand on a quiet beach, watching the ocean. Not always easy to find a spot like this, but worth it every time. I highly recommend a little Beach Therapy, whenever you can find it.

What is Cafe Marian?

I'm all over the map, racing to keep up with the creative monkeys who are spinning around in my head!

Okay, that starts to sound like some sort of psychological problem, but there is so much in the world to see, fascinating new things to learn and interesting new places to explore. I've never been very good at concentrating on only one thing for very long. The world seems to want us to specialize, but that's hard for me. I get bored and restless.

After years of living in my left brain (that practical, rational, analytical, logical place where most of us reside), I'm working to spend more time in my right brain (creativity, inventiveness, intuitiveness, empathy and joy). I believe the key to it all is balance. Balance seems easy enough, but the trick is finding the balance point that works for you. And beware, that point is constantly moving, so when you lose your balance... and you will... readjust and keep on going.

So, here we are, at Cafe Marian, a gathering place where I can write and share the stories I find that are interesting, smart, amazing, fascinating, genuine, amusing, impressive, clever, inventive, creative and fun.